Tuesday Evening Kicker: 2020 Week 2 Recap

In the first round of division action, there were two ugly results. Two other division battles went down to the wire. The Ewoks picked up a big win over the Wookiees and the Squirrels squeaked out a 3-point victory over Bangkok.

Kamikazes deep fry the Crabs

Nagasaki Kamikazes 240.93, Christmas Island Crabs 183.4 — Amid their payback tour, the Kamikazes laid a 57-point smackdown on their division rival, the reigning Super Bowl champion Crabs. Without Michael Thomas and A.J. Brown, the Kamikazes scored 240.93 points, led by a group effort. Running back Aaron Jones scored 49.2 points to lead all scorers. Kyler Murray followed closely behind with 38.33 points, tight end Travis Kelce added 30.5 points, and running back Ezekiel Elliott finished with 25.6. The Crabs were led by quarterback Russell Wilson with 33.75 points. D.J. Moore scored 26.25 points, Tyler Lockett put up 23.7 points, and a returning Miles Sanders finished with 23.1. Next Week: Nagasaki heads to Wake Island to take on the Wookiees. Christmas Island will try to pick up its first victory when they take on the Jerks.

Backs against the Wall(er), Grainers fight back in the fourth quarter

Ukraine Grainers 181.22, Russia Renegades 167.95 — Heading into the fourth quarter with the game virtually tied and only Darren Waller remaining, the Grainers came out swinging. The tight end tallied 36.3 points to lead all scorers. All World running back Christian McCaffrey sustained an injury, but first scored 28.4 points. Wide receiver Tyreek Hill added 26.75 points and David Montgomery finished with 24.9. For the Renegades, receiver Calvin Ridley continued his hot start by posting 35.9 points. Running back Kareem Hunt put up 26.1 points and Lamar Jackson added 22.9. The Renegades were burned by lineup decisions, leaving 48.7 points on the bench. Next Week: Ukraine will try to make it three in a row when they face Egypt in non-conference action. Russia will try to get off the schneid when they take on North Division rival Switzerland.

Tricky Higbee awfully prickly for the Blitz ‘D’

Switzerland Squirrels 178.9, Bangkok Blitz 175.25 — In the closest battle of the week, the Squirrels squeaked by the Blitz behind 31.65 points from tight end Tyler Higbee. Running back Leonard Fournette showed up with 30 points and quarterback Gardner Minshew finished with 27.5. The Blitz received 44.3 points from quarterback Dak Prescott in the loss. Tight End Jonnu Smith put up a whopping 27.15 points. Rookie running backs Jonathan Taylor (24.2) and Clyde Edwards-Helaire (15) were also instrumental. Next Week: Switzerland will look for its second straight win when they face North foe Russia. Bangkok will try to rebound when they face South rival Turkey.

Evans can’t wait: Receiver bursts out of gate to lead Jerky over Pharaohs

Turkey Jerky 168.75, Egypt Pharaohs 159.22 — Turkey scored a big divisional victory over Egypt behind 28.4 points from receiver Mike Evans. Fellow wideout Tyler Boyd tallied 25.2 points, Jared Goff added 25.6 points and Melvin Gordon finished with 20.2. For the Pharaohs, quarterback Patrick Mahomes led the team with 31.42 points. Receiver Robby Anderson added 21.9 points and Odell Beckham finished with 19.9. Next Week: Turkey aims to make it two in a row when they face another South Division rival, Bangkok. Egypt will look for its first victory of the season when they take on Ukraine.

No ‘Bark’, all bites: Ewoks crunch Saquon-less Wookiees

Ecuador Ewoks 157.37, Wake Island Wookiees 122.7 — The Wookiees lost a key member of their team for the game, and the season, when running back Saquon Barkley went down early with a knee injury. Ecuador capitalized and cruised to victory behind 26.47 points from Ryan Tannehill, 21.1 points from Keenan Allen, and 20.3 points from Raheem Mostert. The Wookiees got 29.5 points from Matt Ryan in the loss. Receiver DeAndre Hopkins tallied 25.55 points and running back Kenyan Drake added 15.5. Next Week: Ecuador hosts West Division rival San Juan. Wake Island takes on East Division foe Nagasaki.

Did-Ja-maica mistake? Scorpions’ 111-point victory stings the Jerks

San Juan Scorpions 250.9, Jamaica Jerks 139.08 — San Juan put up an astounding 250.9 points and nearly lapped the Jerks in a statement game for control of the West Division. Running backs Alvin Kamara (41 points) and Nick Chubb (30.7), receivers Stefon Diggs (35.05) and Terry McLaurin (30.5), and quarterback Josh Allen (34.5) all posted huge numbers in the rout. For the Jerks, quarterback Cam Newton scored 41.63 points — almost 30% of his team’s scoring. Running backs Chris Carson (23.2) and Dalvin Cook (19.9) were instrumental as well. Half of Jamaica’s starters scored single-digits in the loss. Next Week: San Juan will try to advance to 3-0 when they take on another West Division rival, Ecuador. Jamaica will look to regroup when they host the winless Crabs.