Armchair GM: Plotting the course for each team in 2020

It’s the offseason! Which means, of course, teams are busy scouting and strategizing on how to improve their team’s outlook for the upcoming season.

But it’s not just those in charge who are busy theorizing. Oh, no. Every Tom, Dick, and Harry has an opinion about the best path forward. The offseason is fertile ground for armchair general managers to lay out their elaborate plans to build a championship team.

Here is one armchair GM’s blueprint for each team.

Bangkok Blitz

The Blitz didn’t tank in 2019 just for the heck of it. It was a strategic decision to “right the ship” and now the franchise has one of the most optimistic outlooks in the MFFL. The Blitz have a handful of good, young players on cheap deals, but it is the league-high $66.25 million of cap space that will make them contenders in 2020. Bangkok has a QB1 in Dak Prescott and a potential RB2 and WR2 in Devin Singletary and Michael Gallup, respectively. The Blitz have the draft capital to go after an NFT should they choose to, or they could load up on promising rookies — which might delay the championship window by a year but could set them up better for the long haul. Additionally, they have the cash to target some of the top running backs who don’t get tagged and are available via the auction. As Armchair GM, I would package Pick 11 and a 2021 first-round pick for one of the top NFTs. Then I would go hard after one or two of the top free agents on the market in the auction. Depending on the price tag, this could leave the Blitz with three top-tier players to go with Prescott, Singletary and Gallup, along with around $20 million to fill out the bottom of their roster. And that’s not even counting on the three rookies they can secure at the top of the draft.

Christmas Island Crabs

The Crabs get to wear the “defending champion” crown until someone else takes it from them. But as far as they’re concerned, they intend to keep that crown for more than one calendar year. Winning back-to-back titles is no easy feat, and the Crabs have a number of tough decisions to make this offseason. The biggest question awaiting them is what to do with All-World wide receiver Michael Thomas. As discussed in previous articles, applying the NFT tag on him might make the most financial sense. While it’s possible teams would bid on him and increase his salary, it seems far-fetched that his cap number would exceed what the EFT tag would cost Christmas Island. Assuming Thomas remains with the club, the Crabs have a trio of fringe-WR1, but solid WR2s in Tyer Lockett, D.J. Moore and DeVante Parker to join Thomas in the receivers room. The Crabs feature a nice pair of running backs in Austin Ekeler and Miles Sanders and they own the RFA rights to Leonard Fournette, as their backfield appears to be shaping up nicely. Second-year pro Noah Fant could build upon his rookie season and be a decent option at tight end. The Crabs will have to retain or replace quarterback Russell Wilson. The Crabs presently have the fifth-most cap space but that will dry up quickly with the retention of Thomas and Fournette. As Armchair GM, I wouldn’t attempt to make any other big splashes as they could be looking at $15 million or less after Thomas and Fournette ink deals. The Crabs have zero draft capital this year or next, thus they have no choice but to go for the repeat.

Ecuador Ewoks

Ecuador has their work cut out for them heading into the 2020 season. They have 15% of their cap space occupied by the cap hit for David Johnson. They’ve already placed the EFT on Ezekiel Elliott for $14.50 million, which eats up almost 20% more of their budget. They have a trio of decent players in tight end Mark Andrews and receivers Jarvis Landry and Golden Tate. But if they’re serious about competing in 2020, they really need to find some good players on cheap deals. That might be difficult to swing due to their relative lack of draft capital. The Ewoks have just two third round picks this year. As Armchair GM, it’s easy for me to say “blow it all up,” but that might be more difficult for the actual GM to stomach. I would start by entertaining trade offers for Elliott to see what kind of haul I could get in return. The minimum offer for me would be two first-round draft picks, because if a trade can’t be swung, my second choice would be switching the EFT to an NFT — which would net two draft picks in return if I let Elliott walk to the highest bidder. I would also think about selling off some of the veteran assets to work on rectifying a bad cap situation and rebuilding with some young talent. Andrews and Landry are good pieces that will help a contending team, but they could be flipped for draft picks who help in 2021 and beyond. I’d also consider acquiring cash in deals for players. While that won’t help clear up the cap space mess, it would help pay forward future salaries and leave them in a better financial situation moving forward.

Egypt Pharaohs

The defending South Division champions have their eyes set on a bigger prize in 2020. To attain it, they’ll have to really do some damage via the auction this coming season. The Pharaohs do not have a first-round pick this season, having traded that in a deal for tight end David Njoku. Meanwhile, tight end is just one of the positions the team will have to upgrade. Egypt has the third-highest cap space this coming season, but they also have the most spots to fill. The first priority should be retaining restricted free agents Patrick Mahomes and Joe Mixon. This would give them their QB1 and RB1. Placing the EFT on Phillip Lindsay would then lock in their RB2 and give the Pharaohs a formidable backfield. Egypt has four wide receivers under contract, but none project to anything higher than a possible WR2. Signing at least two more receivers with WR2 floors would be a wise decision. Finding a top tight end can be a crapshoot. Njoku played in three games last year and likely has a brighter 2020 future, but the Pharaohs need to solidify the position. Using one of their draft picks on a rookie prospect or taking a chance on a cheap option would make sense.

Jamaica Jerks

Jamaica enters the 2020 offseason with the second-most amount of cap space. But that cap space is going to fill up quickly when you consider the amount of talent that they’d like to retain. The Jerks have potential starters set at wide receiver, tight end and quarterback in Julian Edelman, Austin Hooper, and Jared Goff, respectively. Although, they may want to consider an upgrade at quarterback given Goff’s erratic play last year. The Jerks could realistically fill out their starting lineup simply by retaining some of their own. As Armchair GM, I would place the Transition Tag on unrestricted free agent Chris Carson and try to bring him back. I’d also match the highest offer to restricted free agent Dalvin Cook, thus locking up the backfield. I’d place the NFT on UFA wide receiver Keenan Allen as well as match the highest offer on Kenny Golladay, thus solidifying the wide receiver position. At that point, the Jerks would have 12 players under contract with maybe $10-15 million of cap space remaining. Cash would be a little tight at that point, but the Jerks do have six draft picks this year, including four in the second round. They could promote the rookies to the Active Roster or they could find some cheap prospects to round out the bottom of the roster. Either way, their starting lineup would be strong and position them in contention for the West Division crown and a playoff run.

Nagasaki Kamikazes

Nagasaki’s mentality heading into the 2020 season must be, how do we break that glass ceiling? Between back-to-back Super Bowl losses, and a loss in the Southeast Conference title game to Christmas Island, the Kamikazes have had their season ended by the last three Super Bowl champions. The Kamikazes presently have the third-highest cash average in the league, thus, they can afford to bring in an extra weapon to help them achieve their goal. They’ve already placed the EFT on wide receiver Davante Adams, as he’s been paired up with Stefon Diggs to form a solid wide receiving duo. Running backs Aaron Jones and Le’Veon Bell will form one of the cheapest and most effective backfields the MFFL has to offer this year. And quarterback Kyler Murray, while a tad expensive, is looking to build off a rookie season that saw him finish as a high-end QB1. The Kamikazes have a young playmaking tight end in T.J. Hockenson, but they sure would like to bring back the league’s best. As Armchair GM, I would place the NFT on unrestricted free agent Travis Kelce. That would give him an affordable starting bid of $4.25 million. Could teams bid on him? Possibly. But giving up two first-round picks might scare away a few teams. The Kamikazes could also bring back RFA James Conner at the right price, further solidifying their backfield. The team could look to free up some salary by trading Diggs, but if not, he’ll surely make an impact in 2020. Even if they retain Kelce and Conner, they could still afford another playmaker if they want to get aggressive. Given that their recent runs have fallen just short of a title, I’m sure that’s on the mind.

Russia Renegades

With a handful of young players under contract last year, Russia had a Super Bowl window primed for the 2020 season. But with some players breaking out, they opened the window wider in 2019 and attempted a title run a season earlier. Now entering the 2020 campaign, the sense of urgency is a little greater. The Renegades have among the lowest amount of cap space, but also have their roster pretty well filled out. Among the highest priorities for a team aiming for a Super Bowl run will be retaining wide receiver DeAndre Hopkins if the price is right. Hopkins will likely receive the NFT, which will force other franchises to pony up the draft capital as well as cash to land him. If he remains in Russia, that will severely limit the amount of available cash to fill out the rest of the roster. Among the other pieces for the Renegades to consider will be retaining restricted free agents Kareem Hunt and Evan Engram. The Renegades might look to free up some cash before the new league year begins, but as presently constructed, they’re poised to make some noise in 2020.

San Juan Scorpions

San Juan has managed the cap well in recent years, which certainly helped them to a Super Bowl run two seasons ago. With the savvy selection of key running backs in recent drafts, the Scorpions have been able to allocate money to the receiver position while their vaunted backfield has been on rookie deals. Now, their hand will be forced as two key running backs will be looking to get paid. Alvin Kamara and Marlon Mack will receive top dollar this offseason. The Scorpions certainly have the money to retain them, though. They have the fourth-most cap space and the highest cash average, given that they only have 7 spots to fill. Despite the impending high salaries of Kamara and Mack, San Juan has once again positioned itself well by shedding the high salaries of aging receivers A.J. Green and T.Y. Hilton and have gone with a youth movement at the position. As Armchair GM, I would certainly lock up Kamara and Mack to long-term deals and not blink twice at their potential cap numbers. I’d also throw the NFT on unrestricted free agent tight end Zach Ertz, giving him an attractive opening bid of $4.25 but more importantly giving other franchises pause about giving up two draft picks for his services. The Scorpions have three draft picks this year, within the first 23 picks of the draft. They should be able to continue adding young, affordable pieces with their strong player personnel department and once more be a factor in the West Division and Northwest Conference.

Switzerland Squirrels

It didn’t take long into the 2019 season for the Squirrels to recognize the need to rebuild for the future. Heck, when starting running back Lamar Miller tore his ACL in the preseason, it sent a dark cloud over the Alps. The Squirrels began selling off pieces for the future and landed some nice assets like receivers D.J. Chark and T.Y. Hilton. The team also reacquired unrestricted free agent Adam Thielen in the offseason after trading him prior to the 2019 trade deadline. They slapped the NFT on him and — assuming he doesn’t receive a lot of action due to a high price tag of salary and two draft picks — he’ll return to Switzerland to form a formidable trio with Chark and Hilton. As Armchair GM, I’d focus all my attention on the running back position. The Squirrels have just six roster spots to fill, the second-fewest in the league. This also gives them the second-highest cash average in the league, meaning they can afford to splurge on a free agent. Switzerland acquired the rights to UFA Mark Ingram, so I’d place the Transition Tag on him and match the highest, reasonable offer. The Squirrels have two picks in the first 16 of the draft, but they might think about packaging Pick 8 with their 2021 first-round pick and go after an NFT. But should they choose to keep their picks, they can always throw some cash at a top running back on the open market.

Turkey Jerky

Turkey has a handful of strong playmakers in running back Melvin Gordon and receivers Mike Evans and Amari Cooper. However, the duo of Gordon and Evans come at a high price. The Jerky will have to be judicious with their dollars entering the auction. They have one pick, the 13th overall selection, which could help them land a cheap young prospect. They also have a few players they need to retain. As Armchair GM, the first thing I would do is place the EFT on Derrick Henry and lock him down for another year of service. Henry was a beast during the 2019 campaign and looks as hungry as ever this offseason, from all indications. Pairing Henry with Gordon would give the Jerky one of the top running back duos in the MFFL. Then, to add to the formidable duo of Evans and Cooper, I’d make sure I retained restricted free agent Cooper Kupp, at the right price. This would give the Jerky five solid starters to compete with, but would then require them to be smart with their remaining dollars, finding bargains via the auction where they can. An alternative option would be to dangle Evans on the trade block and see if there is any kind of market for him. That could help them free up some cash for other signings.

Ukraine Grainers

The Grainers arguably had the best ball club in the MFFL in 2019 — if total points and record are any indication. But they ran into a runaway freight train that was the Christmas Island Crabs in the Super Bowl. Clearly, the Grainers are looking to get over the hump and win that elusive title in 2020. The first step was retaining the ridiculous Christian McCaffrey, he of the 33 points per game average. Ukraine had no other choice but to place the EFT on him to keep his cost down. The Grainers have the third-fewest roster spots to fill, and the fifth-highest cash average. They will need to bleed that average a little to retain restricted free agent wide receiver Chris Godwin. They’ll also have to reach into their pockets a little bit to retain RFA quarterback Deshaun Watson. As Armchair GM, I would make it a priority to lock up both players and keep the band together for another season. The Grainers have four draft picks this year, including the fifth-overall selection. That could get them an instant contributor with a little luck. But at the very least, it’s an additional young player on a cheap deal that can help them manage the cap moving forward.

Wake Island Wookiees

Even after cutting three players this offseason in a cap-saving move, the Wookiees still have the fewest open roster spots in the MFFL. They only have about $20 million of available cash to spend, but they only need a couple pieces to the puzzle. The Wookiees need a TE1, a WR2, and a RB2/3 — depending on Kenyan Drake’s NFL status, which is to be determined. As Armchair GM, I would look to spend up to half my remaining cap space to bring in a No. 2 receiver. I would also ensure I get a starting tight end, but without overpaying — which was a problem with Eric Ebron and Greg Olsen, two of the cap casualties for the Wookiees this offseason. While the top tier running back market would likely price me out, I’d look to add a moderate piece, perhaps a niche player with a specific pass-catching role or a backup handcuff who has an outside chance of starting. The Wookiees have two draft picks in the upcoming draft, a first-rounder and a third-rounder. The first round pick could provide them with an instant contributor, or at the very least could be a cheap contract to fill out the bottom of the roster.